A Tale of Two Families
Posted by: branwynne77 on: October 9, 2007
I know of no completely different families than the ones I’m about to relate to you in this post. One is conventional….the other would be condemned by neo-cons everywhere. I guess I’ll do the conventional one first.
Family 1#
My sister and her now deceased husband. It hurts to say this, but what remains of their family is extremely destructive and dysfunctional. My nephew is ok, gets good grades and stays out of trouble. My eighteen year old niece runs wild, sleeps around a lot, and has trouble already with the human papillomavirus. She has stolen a car, done juvie countless times, and does drugs. She doesn’t care about anything it seems. I’ve tried to reach out to her but .. All she has done is lie and steal from me. The girl is extremely manipulative and I don’t particularly care for her.
I know. She’s my own flesh, but I can not stand her.
Her mother, my half-sister, is much the same way. Although she’s less self destructive and has found religion. (Rolls eyes) Maybe it’s true.
My dead brother-in-law always treated me nice, but the drugs he and my sister took, the cheating on her (she cheated on him too) led to his eventual diagnosis of being positive for HIV. She’s HIV positive too.
All I can do is send them my thoughts, though I wish those two women weren’t related to me.
Family 2#
I have a gay co-worker that has just now managed to adopt his partner’s fifteen year old granddaughter. Together, they make a good family–I‘ve seen them. They go to church. They are strict with her. They make sure she gets the best education possible. And guess what? They hate drugs and orgies.
She loves them back. She’s *gasp* not gay or promiscuous. She’s well behaved and respectful. I noticed a WWJD bracelet, so I assumed that she has faith, and seems very well adjusted to life.
She is much healthier in all the ways that count than my hellion niece.
So what makes a family functional? It certainly isn’t one man and one woman, as evidenced by my examples. It isn’t the “gays” that are ruining the institution of marriage; it is the “straights”. It takes more than a license to bind people as a family; it takes love and dedication.
6 Responses to "A Tale of Two Families"
October 9, 2007 at 3:46 am
I’ve seen families that don’t make sense, too.The facade is shiny but thin. There are a lot of rotten people out there.
October 10, 2007 at 12:09 am
Hi Val… I know your heart is in the right place, as it always is. However… I have to say that at least in this post you are utilizing some fairly sweeping generalizations…
To be honest family number one isn’t anywhere near conventional… By any standard (conservative or liberal) so the entire premise is based on a false label… I see your point. I know that gay couples are condemned by the religious right and yet I feel you’re defeating your own premise by using the exact same tactics… Labeling, generalizing and antagonizing.
There are good parents and bad parents… Being gay doesn’t necessarily make you a good parent, being straight doesn’t necessarily make you a bad parent and vice versa. In fact sexuality should have nothing to do with it…
You are literally making the conservative argument… In reverse. Either way it doesn’t hold water.
“So what makes a family functional? It certainly isn’t one man and one woman, as evidenced by my examples. It isn’t the “gays” that are ruining the institution of marriage; it is the “straights”.”
Good parents make a family functional… Whether they be gay or straight, male or female… And it’s not the gays or the starights that are ruining the institution of marriage… It’s just people! Why do we have to label everything?
I’m sorry if I have offended you… I know this is your blog and you can say whatever you wish. I just felt it needed to be said. Please don’t be angry with me.
October 10, 2007 at 1:01 am
Yeah, you’re right. I know for a fact that there are gay people that would make horrible parents. I was just using these two seperate families as examples, not as a general rule.
(It’s hard to offend me when it comes to something I say. I like it when people disagree with me. Respectfully.)
October 10, 2007 at 1:02 am
And considering gay people can’t legally get married, I think it’s safe to say the people that CAN get married are the ones ruining it.
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October 9, 2007 at 3:33 am
You explained this all so perfectly. I hope I see the day when gays are seen to be just as “decent” as “everyone else”. I say everyone else with tongue firmly planted in cheek.